I Love New Jersey

I Just filled my tank with ten dollars from a quater tank....I am pretty excited about this. I will be watching football today...the eagles need the bears and bucs to lose and a couple moons of jupiter to come into alignment to go to the playoffs....I would like a christmas miracle Lord...."With God all things are possible"

Dressing up for Christmas

Its interesting that christians dress up for christmas eve services when it usually isnt their standard practice when coming to church. When one of my family members found out i was wearing jeans they said to me "its christmas eve." i dont understand the difference. i guess the idea is that it is a special holiday so we should treat it as such. this whole thing goes back to the other whole thing about dressing up in church at all. The tradition comes from the idea of respecting the presence of God and giving him your very best. i guess i understand that. But you can give your best in other ways than taking time to get dressed. An who is to say that that is the best style of worship for everyone. What if dressing up makes you attention hungry. What if it makes you prideful. Is it then the best way? I have also heard people say that i would dress up more for a date than for Jesus. Good point, but i will never have to for Jesus. We dress up on dates to impress and we cant imprss God. So what if we bring our informalities, our selves unaltered into God's house. Maybe more people would be honest with themselves and with others. Dressing up to me is putting on a show in some way. Its fun and people look at you different. It is necessary for some situations but not all. Worship to me is not one of those situations. Maybe God wants us to be organic and a alittle less processed. maybe god wants us to just be real. That is my defense for not dressing up for church. Although the real reason is probably laziness. thoughts on this matter would be interesting.

Advet Conspiracy (Cont)

So o I have changed how i view Christmas. i never though t i would say this but it is so much about family. over this Holiday Season i may be able to see my entire immediate family...That is awesome and is such a blessing. I am also spending time with friends and centering myself for the second half of my school year. I love Christmas because of family. I really love that that is true. i also love that video. It really makes you wonder about our values. What is Christmas about? It is an age old question. i like to think it is about family, about rest and about giving in some way. God, give me ways to give...let that be our prayer.

Advent Conspiracy

check this video out.

I have learned so much about Christmas over the past two years. my battery is dying again...more on he next post

Sorry i didnt finish my previous post

i think my point was pretty well developed and i am not thinking on such things anymore...There is something i have been thinking about recently in terms of relationships. Why is it that we think not talking about things makes them go away. Example: One person likes another and they are super close as friends. she doesn't tell him for a while but then she tells him. He doesn't like her but he doesn't say that. Instead he spends some time trying to make himself like her. This doesn't work. So he ends up getting "I dont like you" dragged out of him kicking and screaming. Why do we do this crap to each other? Why not be straight forward. Rip off the bandaid. it hurts more immediatley but less in the end. And dont act all awkward about liking people. People are people and they like each other sometimes. It doesnt mean they want to marry you, they just may be interested. This isnt affecting me at all right now but i have been there before. It wasnt bad for me because the girl honestly wasnt sure. When she figured it all out we talked soon afterwards but i know guys who have been through this for years. It is usually guys. Guys will hold onto relationship hope if it is a string over a canyon...seriously. Girls, dont give guys even the slightest inkling and expect them to get the hint...they wont. They will hang on fo dear life...That is all on that.

Good day... i will seperate my other topic on another blog...i guess i ad more thoughts than i thought.

All Your Promises WON'T Let Go of Me

I haven't blogged in a while. This has been an incredible month. I preached three or four times. All of them were awesome, especially the time at my youth group at home. I have a couple opportunities in December and January. The Eagles started out the month horrible but have woken up in December. Oh my...now to today, and what a day it has been. I am thinking about the show the Bachelor. Any watchers? basically it is a show that takes 30 women and one man and puts them in a situation where 30 are competing for one. OH yeah, and the women live together. I have only ever watched finales. The last two. both are so sure that this guy is everything they have ever wanted. Both are sure, one is right. We often hear these stories. Two people, both so in love and married 30 years get asked how they met. A twinkle gets in their eye and they tell the whole story. Somewhere in there there is another person That isnt in the story long. He was the terrible relationship someone was in. The one that if they would have never gotten out of, they would have never found happiness. They were so sure he/she was the one but the real person for them was just a friend. Both are sure, the other and the story teller, one finds what they are looking for, in someone else, and it was meant to be, the other is left questioning emotions. These are our stories. Maybe not all of us. But too many of us can identify with Guy/ Girl number 2 on these reality shows. We go into the finale sure, but we dont get the last rose. These stories are great to hear but maybe we should think of number 2 a little more. Cause where are all of us twos left. We are left with the option of trusting God and the all to cliched Christian Relationship advice. I trust him but it is hard. I am not heart broken at all. But i find myself looking at this God i follow and asking him the next step. Married People that read this, i could use an "i was there once addison." This is a difficult season..please comment..battery running out...must stop...more tommorrow

woo...what a weekend

this has been quite a weekend. it has been tiring but i ate a lot of great food. I am so happy with the awesome things God has allowed me to do as of late. Although at the same time i fell that i am not taking full advantage of all the awesome things God has given me. I mean i could be learning more from my classes and procrastinating less. i dont know i will never be perfect but i feel like i could be better. i am way to tired to process thoughts. I really need some peace and quiet. I am at the church but i want to leave kind of but i just want it to be quiet around me. like i said i am tired and i feel like i am on the verge of really snapping and offending someone. Lets just say i am glad i have tomorrow off because i need some addison time. ireally have nothing to write today. I am just done with this week and ready to get some serious rest.

On a booking

the last one messed up...sorry. I am currently in ford city, PA at kait brumbaugh's house and this booking has been pretty great. The trip was very long but now we are here. We will be serving in their church service tomorrow. i am excited. Kait's dad is currently telling a story of kaits dog being neutered. this is pretty funny. We have eaten a lot of food in the past 11 hours. We thought we were going to be able to see the sheetz headquaters in altoona pa. i was super excited because i love my job at sheetz. side not i love my job a lot. i started on the floor last night and it was awesome. i am very excited about tommorrow and i am enjoying time with Kait's family and enjoying the fact that we are all in the same house and having an awesome time. I am enjoying life right now. Later guys.

On a booking

ugh

it has been a pretty long day. It started out awesome. I woke up after ten hours and i got some important work done. I went into Master's today feeling pretty good about life. Then we had good director time and a good class. Then we got into setting up for the night. I realized tonight some of my frustrations that seem to arise when i work with people who i dont usually work with. When i work with Youth, things are normal. I know how our team works together and i generally trust the decision making of my team mates. But then i work with other leaders. They are all excellent but i just dont get them as well as i get Daniel, for example. I get asked to do something and i deeply ask "WHY?"This isnt a big thing by any means. For the most part, i have no problem working with other church leaders and it is me that has the issue, not them. I need to learn to work with people that arent "my people." Also the set up process was stressful. It was a lot and because we dont do it every week it didnt run as smoothly as weekly set up does. but we got it done and it was a good night. I got a chance to talk to Jason Fitch which i always enjoy. We did tear down and it was equally as stressful as set up. It just felt like there was so much to do. I am not complaining...just venting. then i got home and i watched the Phillies win the World Series. I am not into baseball a lot but this is a huge deal. I grew up in the Philadelphia area and i have been watching news stories for years about Philly fans being disappointed...again because the Phillies/Eagles/Sixers/Flyers choked when they should have done it. But this year they did it. IT was bigger than even the world series. I am happy. Hopefully the Eagles can get one too this year. Thank you for reading and listening to me complain. No Spiritual application today...sorry but sometimes life just leaves you needing sleep.

i didnt realize..

how much Jocey's story still affected me. I talked about recently and i cried so hard that i couldnt talk. I didnt really even know Jocey well. I had an odd perspective on the whole situation. I cared deeply for the family in their grief but i didnt know Jocey. That week, i fought alongside a powerful church that unapologetically asked for the miraculous just so that i could talk to Jocey and met this amazing person that i kept hearing about. So we prayed. We had faith. We fought harder than i have ever fought. We had a prayer room on thursday with more energy then i have ever felt. I can still hear Brooks Page in my head singing "This is where it counts." It was beautiful...all of it. But then i attended her funeral. She died. We saw again that we are not God. It hurt. I remember working on thursday and looking up at God and deeply asking why? It tore me apart because i had to deal with a side of God tat i dont really like. This is the side that is infinitly beyond us and operates beyond our reason. We baptised 97 people that week, but like Job's restoration, that didnt do it for me (thanks J for this freeing discussion on Job). But this story has had wings. We talked about it last wednesday in prayer because we were singing how great is our God(our youth sang it as they let go of their friend). Angie Rife got up and talked aboutI her daughter. Then someone else did, then i did. I cried really hard as i spoke and i couldnt do it. I could barely speak through the tears. I felt tha God was going to continue to heal through that story and it motivated people to ask boldly in prayer, The result was a rediculous amount of emotional healing that night. George Donaldson looked at Alan that night and said I love you to his brother for the first time. It was amazing and i take no credit. MY whole plan for prayer got blown up by Gods plan. He wanted to heal people that night and i was praying for change until we...changed. I heard even more stories resulting from Jocey. Someone even told me that as they heard Ricky share, they felt God's love for the first time. This is so amazing. Jocey, your story isnt done healing people. It has left a wake and it has wings.

Sick

I am back to the blogging business. I love doing this and it is just a matter of finding time. i am sick in several ways. For one i am actually physically sick. I have a cold and it is terrible. For two, i am sick of this stupid election. I understand the importance but i feel like i eat dinner with Barack and John on a daily basis. Also, i am asking God to make me sick of the state of the world. I have been big on this recently. What will it take? understand i am talking to myself mostly but if this hits you then do what you will. I say i want the wold to change but i would be okay if it stayed the same. I ask for a revolution but i dont really care that much. I want to care but i dont. I have been thinking about revolutions and the first one that comes to mind is America..."Give me Liberty or give me Death." that is commitment. That is intensity. That is a heart that has rebelled. This isnt passive resistance or a so so attitude. This is serious rebellion. When will this happen for us as Christians. Think about lets say Pornography. Our first thought is that it is bad and needs to not happen anymore. It causes terrible permanent spiritual scarring for the audience and performers. It is a sick industry that tears down the image of God in Women who are beautiful and could change the world. We know this but if porn goes on for ten more years, will we be upset? will we care? will we say "oh, Satans always gonna get his foot in?" or will we have the spirit of a revolutionary? Imagine if our forefathers would have said "ahh, we are always going to have taxation without representation, no need to fight that, its too big." Unbelieveable right? and yet this is our attitude. We need to fight and not be satisfied with things like porn for another second. That is the spirit that changes the world. That is a heart that says, "Give this world liberty or give me death." IT doesnt take long to find places where liberation is necessary, but do we care enough?

Frustrated

I cant stand the way people act about politics. i mean i tried to ask an aquaintance of mine from high school why he supported obama and i went on to explain that i dont not like either candidate very much. he responded by saying if i dont agree with him i should keep my opinion to myself and not waste his time....wow. i mean cant we talk about htis stuff without being children. i am frustrated by this crap. side note i will probably go third party this year. tthe phrase narrow minded is funny, especially when you look at the people who use it. The kid that said this stuff to me would probably call me narow minded because i am a christian and i believe there is a standard of how we should all live. I suppose that is a narrow minded view but i love people regaurdless of weather they hold it or not. i love people before they agree with me. Unbelivers seem to hate people until they agre with them. Its almost as if we call anyone who doesnt agree with us narrow minded. this is a rant and i realize this. But look at the people who use the phrase narow minded. Most who say it are pretty narrow minded themselves. some people are so narrow minded that they assume everyone is that way. So there are two tracks...agree....disagree. This is rediculous

I am done i think

Addison

Oh how i love sundays

so today was great. The eagles won and everyone in their division lost to teams that are absolutely terrible.  it was all very great. I cannot wait to see the Kadish or Redding Families. OH the trash talk. I also watch EMHO (Extreme makeover Home edition tonight. The woman on there was awesome. She had a water bed and gave it to a friend so that her friend could have a bed. The catch was hat it left her sleeping on what wasnt even a full sized couch...WOW. I am pretty sure this lady wasnt a christian and yet she did this deed and has been a 1st grade teacher for 29 years. I find myself humbled by the people i wouldnt expect to be humbled by, but perhaps that is why it is humbling. You cant really be humbled by someone who you know has it more together than you. You expect that. You are humbled when you realize that your perception of someone was wrong and that they are actually much closer to the kind of stuff God wants than you are. Anyway, i was supposed to work today but i couldn't because i am not registered for training yet because i wasnt in the system in time on friday...whatever...ended up being a great day. Well i am talking to ritter now so peace out 

watching mad tv and they are making fun of obama and mccain...how mccain is old and obama is using only the words hope and change interchangeably....pretty funny and clean.

so i had a pretty great day today. We had a meting about vision for kids ministry and i am pretty sure this is the most i have never been this excited about an upcoming ministry opportunity . I am still working on the idea of ministering out of myself. Man it is so easy to fall into. Man, God has been tearing my heart up recently, in a good way. Like i was listening to "Jesus, YOu're my super hero" today in the car and i was near tears...to a silly kids song. I was also noticing the beauty of a song called "let the children come." Like just listening to "Jesus music" can be so good. I am also noticing how negative Christians can be. I think Jesus sees the way i and other christians act and he says "wow, they are missing th point. WHY CANT WE BE UPLIFTING PEOPLE WITHOUT IT BEING ODD. why cant i say to people..."wow, you are a really great person and i love the way you do things." Imagine how much people would want to be in the Christian world if we were people who made people feel happy that they were them. We tell people to be confident and know who they are in Christ but we don't speak to them like jesus would. We use this thing called sarcasm...which is satan's lies dressed up in comedy. He sems to be incredible at that. Look at the sins he's done it with..homosexuality, conventional mairrage, virginity before mairrage, what about going to hell (anybody thinking AC/DC on this one). Satan has taken positive speech and made it wierd so Christians beat each other up with their mouths. I beat people up with my mouth. Imagine how much more ppl would want to be around us if we were uplifting people. for those of you who are close to me, call me out on being negative because i want to change.

On a personal note, i made the mistake of drinking two coffees and a fountain soda at sheetz today and driving home i was physically shaking from my high caffine levels. Big mistake, i will never do that again. I started my training today and it was great. I am excited to work there and i hope to finally use my job for God and not just treat it like i hate it. (side note: i am amazed at the trash they show on TV, i am trying to relax and watch it and everything is really trashy, i am not one to complain about mild crap , its tv, but it really is bad like stuff i didnt even know they were allowed to show, the stuff that messes with your spirit) But yes life is really good right now and i am excited that God is teaching me stuff and i am letting him do it without my ife aving to be crazy. Please keep me in prayer. I apologizer for the incredble length of this blog

Well...after one week..

it has been quite a week. Updating blogs is so very difficult. You think you will have time but you dont. So theology has been a very difficult class. We all failed an exam last thursday...all of us. So spiritually, God has shown me the dangers of giftedness more and more. Charity and i had a conversation that was not long enough last night abot the dangers of ministering out of ourselves. It can happen so easily. I am listening to samuel right now and it talks about ho saul was a head above the rest. He was lined up for his job but he did it by himself and it hurt him. God help me to not be a person that sits on my gifts and doesnt trust you. Let me minister by the power of the spirit. To clear up my last blog, i didnt think it was funny that we made too much noise and disturbed Karen Trout. That was not cool and i know that. I apologized to Karen Trout later and let her know that i was sorry for disturbing her. Now that that is out of the way, youth group was awesome last night. It finally felt like things were breaking. Youth were involved in worship and it felt different. It was excellent and i loved it. I have just really been enjoying life lately. Please pray for me that i am able to know what i want God to do in my life and chase after it with everything i have. But yeah, Life has been really great. I feel like i am learning a lot and i feel liek i am getting to know more about the bible and God. That side of things has really been great

back in the blogging game

so i am back. I am psyched...anyone else psyched? so yeah i had a pretty excellent day today. Thursays are notoriously long here at GMC. coming off of wednesday night into early thursday absolutely kills. It is all good though. Today in Theology we watched "everything is spiritual." it is a Rob Bell dvd and it has some good stuff on it. watch it sometime. i realized today that religion really is totally faith. sometimes i get to thinking that what i believe has this intense amount of backing and that the truth is unavoidable, and it is, if you have the right perspective. What if you dont believe this book called the bible is true? well then you just debunked most of why i believe in Jesus. So then even to believe the bible is faith. maybe thats why it is impossble to please God without faith. why would you worry about pleasing him if this bible isnt true. well anyway thats the thought i had. i would appreciate feedback on this idea. Help me to see if i am being wrong or if this sounds legit. Also today, i got yelled at by Karen Trout. I apologized later. what happened is that rachel r, rachel b, and i were in the lobby. Rachel r starts to laugh which is loud and Mrs. Trout taked to us about our volume. we said we would settle down and she went away. Then we started being loud again so she started to come back out. When we saw her....we all ran in oppsite directions. It corrected the problem and it was hilarious. well thats all i am going to write today. Good day to you all

And I still have 2 hours left

Work

Mewithoutyou

I am absolutley enthralled with this band. They are so freaking good. I saw them in concert recently. One of there new songs is about beetles. Being interested in a fire....I think...they describe it as a great light. Anyway a couple lyrics interst me. Here they are I will add more later...

(Beetle king talking to children)

I'm sorry my children you've all been decieved
You've been calling me dad but your true dad's not me
I had sex with your mom and your form was concieved
But your fathers the life within all that you see...and he holds without arms and he speaks without sounds

Work

I have mandatory overtime at my job ,and tonite we are staying until 1AM its all good though it will go by quick

Test

Testing to see if this works

Hey

my beggining in blogging - July 7 2008

So this is my blog that i will try to update on the daily. i guess everyone tries that though. i mostly wrote this because i want people to know whats on my mind. Even though you might still have to ask. I have never really blogged before so i dont know whagt the standard length is or whatever. As far as my life goes right now. I am currently a disciple and a discipler at Gettysburg Master's Commission. It has been one heck of a crazy ride. i have gained some amazing friends and i have seen myself change. I honestly look in the mirror now and i see someone else. The eyes looking back at me seem less scared and more ready. More confident. Despite all this, sometimes I look at the world and situations around me and i look myself and i look at my Jesus and i ask him where he could possibly be evident in all this. But he is in everything and by him everything is made. Without him, nothing is. I love John 1. I love my Jesus and i will follow him. I just hate the season where he doesnt let us understand him. But i dont want to understand him. If i did, i wouldnt need him. As Sanctus Real says. "I'm not alright, thats why i need you..." I recently picked up Coldplay's Viva la Vida. I am very pleased with it. I like the title i think most. It is derived from the french revolution. This was where frenchman took back their country by forced from a ruling party that they believed no longer served there intrest. Side note:they asked america to help out in this revolution because they helped us in ours. America was split on the issue but we didnt end up helping out. They were pretty mad. Anyway, they would say "Viva la France" as they took their nation back. So viva la vida interest me. I find Christian truth in it. As you know "vida" means life and it is from the same route word as vitality and vital. "Vital organs" organs you need to live. So what if, as christians we began to take back our abundant life with the force of revolutionaries? what would that look lke? "Look Satan, i am tired of your oppressive rule and ownership and you are just not doing things right...i am taking my power back." Now Christianity creates this thing where we never really take control. We chose to let Jesus in and he brings about the revolution where he takes authority. So we are not gaining power for us, but to hand it over to the lord, a much better king that we know has our best interest at heart. So let us always keep the passion of revolutionaries. Daily choosing to follow the new leadership and keep the spirit of the revolution of the heart alive.
That is all