i didnt realize..

how much Jocey's story still affected me. I talked about recently and i cried so hard that i couldnt talk. I didnt really even know Jocey well. I had an odd perspective on the whole situation. I cared deeply for the family in their grief but i didnt know Jocey. That week, i fought alongside a powerful church that unapologetically asked for the miraculous just so that i could talk to Jocey and met this amazing person that i kept hearing about. So we prayed. We had faith. We fought harder than i have ever fought. We had a prayer room on thursday with more energy then i have ever felt. I can still hear Brooks Page in my head singing "This is where it counts." It was beautiful...all of it. But then i attended her funeral. She died. We saw again that we are not God. It hurt. I remember working on thursday and looking up at God and deeply asking why? It tore me apart because i had to deal with a side of God tat i dont really like. This is the side that is infinitly beyond us and operates beyond our reason. We baptised 97 people that week, but like Job's restoration, that didnt do it for me (thanks J for this freeing discussion on Job). But this story has had wings. We talked about it last wednesday in prayer because we were singing how great is our God(our youth sang it as they let go of their friend). Angie Rife got up and talked aboutI her daughter. Then someone else did, then i did. I cried really hard as i spoke and i couldnt do it. I could barely speak through the tears. I felt tha God was going to continue to heal through that story and it motivated people to ask boldly in prayer, The result was a rediculous amount of emotional healing that night. George Donaldson looked at Alan that night and said I love you to his brother for the first time. It was amazing and i take no credit. MY whole plan for prayer got blown up by Gods plan. He wanted to heal people that night and i was praying for change until we...changed. I heard even more stories resulting from Jocey. Someone even told me that as they heard Ricky share, they felt God's love for the first time. This is so amazing. Jocey, your story isnt done healing people. It has left a wake and it has wings.